“The most beautiful gifts cannot be bought – they are born”
How does a four year old know how to play the violin? How does a child memorize states and capitals when they still do not know how to read? How does another one have the hand eye coordination of an athlete? And what about those children who can see patterns? Where does this come from?
I’ve learned that science is showing us that we really do come into this world with different brains. Some brains are wired to hear pitch perfectly. Some are wired to see patterns. And then there’s the part of science that can’t explain anything. Some cultures say these gifts are from past lives. Some call it soul memory, and some call it a gift from God.
I love learning about the lives of my friends and famous people, because I always wonder how they found and developed their birth gift. I am learning that some people are just born knowing. A comedian knows he is funny before anyone ever laughs. A child knows she can play an instrument before she ever holds one. An athlete knows he can run before anyone times him. Oprah wrote that she knew, innately, that she was going to become someone famous. So did Dolly Parton. So what is this phenomenon that some people exhibit, this ability to just know what they were meant to do?
The old saying goes, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. This means we inherit skills and behaviors from our family. We learn by watching them. It seems to me that prodigies are born with a gift, but it’s not like they can perform perfectly the first time around. They spend hours and hours improving themselves. However, they started with a gift, so it’s like they had a couple of steps up. I mean, if you can do something really well, it’s easy to want to keep improving. If you don’t have this beginning gift, you have to work hard just to be okay. It takes a lot of hard practice and work to want to improve.
I love to meet people who have a special talent. I always ask them, “How did you learn to sing? How did you learn about food, or art, or jewelry?” It almost always comes down to family or friends. I remember our son who saw his second grade teacher playing the violin, and then wanted to learn. I was so excited that he showed an interest in music since he seemed to be devoted to baseball. We went immediately to Hogeye, the neighborhood music store. Walter, our salesman, didn’t think he really wanted to play the violin. So he kept showing Nick other instruments, the guitar, banjo, trombone, saxophone. Nick was focused on his intended choice and said; “No, No, I want to play the violin!” Why, we asked, “Because it begins with the letter V.” That made sense to me because he was a product of watching Sesame Street. I was sure he was going to be a prodigy. Doesn’t every parent think their child is special? It turns out he didn’t like practicing. When he joined the orchestra at the Junior High School, only girls played the violin, while all his friends played wind instruments so he changed.
Because of Nick, I took up the violin, but I believe I am tone deaf. I grew up in a house where the only sound I heard was from the television. Perhaps a child who grows up in a house where music is always playing, and where a family member is encouraging musical talent is pre-inclined to be some sort of musician. Maybe that child didn’t just inherit good ears, maybe they inherited 10,000 hours of listening while they were in the womb and in their crib?
My mother’s birth gift was being able to tell stories. She didn’t just tell a story. She acted them out, giving all her characters voices. She also was able to change facial expressions becoming the person she was speaking for. She pulled you in and made you feel like you were right there with her in her drama. I always felt like I was sitting on a cloud watching her perform. She should have been an actress. I believe some of my desire to tell stories comes from my mother. I try to emulate how she performed. How she was able to bring people in when she started to relate an experience. I believe my birth gift came from her.
Because when something happens to me, or when I read a book, I don’t just retell what happened. I try to make it more interesting for the person I’m telling it to. I look for the part that is relatable, the part that might get a chuckle or make my listener think; “Yes, I felt that too.” Living more than seven decades, I have had many life experiences, therefore, I have empathy. I find it fascinating how circular everything is in life. Which make me alway think that some people are just born having a special gift. The rest of us spend our lives waiting for that attribute to find us.
It makes me recall when we took our son, Nick, to college. We were seated in an auditorium at orientation for class introductions. The area was cordoned off with all the different fields of study. When the introduction was completed, the freshman were told to move to the area they planned to study. Just about all the students got up and moved. Yet, Nick, and about ten other students didn’t know what their field would be. They were in the undecided section. I wondered, how did all the other students know their future careers?
Today the term “birth gift” is referred to as a “superpower”? I believe a birth gift is what you are given and a superpower is what you do with it. A superpower is active and makes me think of super hero’s. Being told it’s a “superpower” makes it feel cool. This past week I have been asking my friends what they feel their “superpowers” are. I really felt that they wouldn’t come up with anything. But they all had answers and it didn’t take them long to respond. One friend told me he sees patterns. He can’t remember numbers, but sees patterns. Another friend said she is a really good organizer. Another said she makes friends easily. Another one said she is interested in obscure subjects. These gifts makes them interesting, and made our conversation became thoughtful and fun! Let me know about your “Superpower.”